Kids Feel secure when they know what the rules are
– Fred Rogers
This term has stuck in my head from a movie that came out in the early 2000s by Samuel L Jackson…it just sounds so good – Rules of Engagement. I think about any high stakes activity – a diffuse team about to approach a bomber, anyone going to battle, a negotiator about to talk someone off a ledge, Navy Seal before a covert mission – I would imagine there are people who have sat down and said okay what are the rules of engagement? How do we interact with the suspect etc etc. I have co-opted the term to ask what are the rules of engagement with screens and kids? Are there any in your home? are they reasonable? Because their brains are still developing, before a certain age, kids have poor self -regulation – they need to be taught how to manage big emotions. We as adults are struggling with how to manage our time online and our brains are fully developed. I think rules of engagement with media use should also be tailored for adults as well. Set yourself times when the screen is off limits, for kids ensure certain tasks get done before engaging with screens. What I think may be more beneficial – especially if the kids are older is engage them in writing up these obligations – give the power back to them. That way they own the outcomes.
These were adapted from https://www.commonsensemedia.org/
Rules of Engagement
0 – 5 years
- Screen Limit per day – not more than 2 hours in a 24 hour period.
- Online content will be monitored at all times.
- There will be no screens in technology free zones – dining table and bedroom
- Screen time will not occur before daily baths and chores get done
- There will be no screen use ½ hr to an hour before bedtime.
- There will be encouragement of educational shows.