So our son started kindergarten at the beginning of this new school year. A few days a week after school ends he is picked up by our neighbor and friend who they are in the same class as I finish up at work. One thing I notice every time he gets in the car he always asks, “mum can I have your phone?” He rarely does this on the regular. The first day I picked him up at the neighbor they were playing Sonic The hedgehog videogame. He was so thrilled I did not get my undies in a bunch. Again with all things screen time its about moderation. The problem comes in when it becomes a habit / daily expectation that is requiring to be met. Then again I also know that these are some tough conversations we will have even as he grows older.
I guess it has me thinking about as parents where do we draw the line in the sand and say hey if they will be playing video games or the kids will be online all night watching inappropriate videos I would rather you do not go to that sleepover. I know its impractical to think we can protect our kids ALL the time from the ubiquitous nature of technology. And really, No parent wants to see their child left out. It takes going back to screen hack number 1 in our playbook – Do not negotiate your non-negotiables. If there are places in your home or moments in your day when you do not want to engage with media and devices just stick with it. One of my mentors in this field Colin Kartchner – I remember him speak once and he said if he would send his then 6 year old son Myles to a friends and they were playing video games he would politely ask the parents to send his son right back home. I wondered to myself wow is that extreme or what. But if you have set those boundaries its easier to hold the boundary than deal with the repercussions of unclear boundaries. With screens and gaming it easily becomes, “one more show,” or one more level.” I say all that to say, screen hack number 5 in your playbook – Find your tribe. Find people in your community or area who are embracing low -tech living and find more ways of connecting that will ease the pressure off you. I recently had a conversation on the podcast with the Executive director of Wait Until 8th pledge. It is a national movement that urges parents to delay handing their kids a smartphone until at least 8th grade. You can listen in here on the podcast. Until next time!