My son today on the way out to pick his little sister from daycare, told me this words as he was shutting off the TV for us to head out – “But mum, I am not yet done.” It was at that instant I realized that try as we may we will never be “done” with fully scrolling and consuming content on the world wide web. But why you ask?
1.) They don’t make em like they used to: Growing up TV shows had what you call “stop cues.” Fresh Prince ended – you saw the closing credits come on – Directed by so and so, makeup & wardrobe etc etc …stop cues. That signaled the end. You wait a week to see what happens next. TV shows nowadays are in ENDLESS supply. Even before one ends you already see the sign – Next episode starting in 5, 4, 3, 2….You start out innocently in Season 1 just to “check it out” and before you know it you are entering ‘Season 3 episode 2″ and it is 2 am. Trust me I have been there done that with the Netflix show – Money Heist. And that is just the nature of the beast; Tv and media is being made to keep us and our little ones glued. The richest in any society own the most scarce resource. Our attention is the scarcest resource in town. We are living in the attention economy. While we are not paying to watch a movie at the theatre you best believe we are exchanging currency through our time and attention. They are both so valuable, guard them. Screen Hack – shut off autoplay option especially if your little is watching Youtube (which I am not a fan of for kids). Just ensure that disable autoplay feature is enabled. That way you give the kids break so they are not zombified with video after video.
2.)The algorithms are always in your favor : “If you feed the beast, the beast will destroy you.” Chamath Palihapithya – former Facebook exec calling bluff on social media algorithms. You can watch his full interview here – It was powerful. Yes there are billions of computers doing the math and punching in numbers based on your interests, places you like, things that make you laugh etc etc. You can watch reel after reel – from Jamaica to Hong Kong – And they will not stop coming until you pump the brakes on them. Screen Hack – before you research something online or go online to even watch videos for entertainment – physically write down what you are looking for and allocate X amount of time to said activity.
3.) The “real world” is boring – of course its is. There are no flying kittens or dancing challenges. The real world is slow and mundane – heck no one is even smiling. The virtual world is free entertainment. All I have to do is click a button and I am following a foodie eat street food in Taiwan. The real world calls on us to literally ” earn your keep.” So to leave the virtual world of endless possibilities to interact with boring stuff that you have to create, is hard on adults even harder on kids. Screen Hack : Pursue things offline that set your soul on fire. There are there. With all things real life – it takes time to hone in on those passions and skills. The same for your kids. Allow them to be bored to find their true self again
4.) Human beings are insatiable – it is what it is. Very few human beings are content with being content. In his book “The organized Mind,” Daniel Levitin says, our brains arousal system has a novelty bias, meanings that its attention can be hijacked easily by something new – the shiny object. It is called the novelty bias, and this bias is more powerful than some of our deepest survival drives : humans will work just as hard to obtain a novel experience as we will to get a meal or a mate. Ask any gamer who has been trying to get to the “next level.” For some reason we are always itching for something bigger, better, faster etc. Technology quells this thirst by offering little squirts of dopamine that make us “feel good” for a while but as soon as it wears off – again that living in reality is a tough pill to swallow
5.)Fear of not belonging Fear of abandonment and shame are huge drivers in wanting to constantly “be on” especially for the older kids – it would be nice to know what plans are being made, where are they going? I am in in!