The past weekend our little family took a small getaway to celebrate Victoria Day here in Canada. We were right at Niagara Falls for a few days and it was splendid! Being the first rest we have had in a while from the hum drum days of winter life, hubby and I purposed to just relax and take it easy. This included not being a screen time police. The main reason I feel this way over holidays and vacations is the kids are in a new environment. Their routines are off, their regular play / loose items are not within reach so having one thing that can add some entertainment and reduce any uncertainty over the novel environs should not have us wringing our hands.
Everything was going well – we carried some DVDs and popcorn, the kids were watching the regular cartoons on the hotel room TV in the morning etc etc. However midway through the trip I begun to notice our son ask and reach for my phone more and more often. It would be a whole production trying to get it back and in his words he would say “they just keep bringing me more and more shows on Sonic, its so cool mum.” Yeah buddy its the algorithm – they want you to keep going on and on. I had carried some Jumbo coloring and activity books, kids charades etc which of course were untouched. The dreaded question many parents detest, “what do I do now?” kept coming up over and over again.
I say all that to say, should you be a screen time police over holiday? My response “You have to decide which screen time hill you are willing to die on.” If tech and screentime will preserve your family wellbeing over the holiday and make for an enjoyable activity for all , sure go for it. However there are some kids who just have a harder time detaching and self-regulating which can make for a horrible experience for all while on vacation that it may not even be worth it. However some general tips I could suggest for screen time and vacations, road trips etc:
1.) Try maintain as much of your regular routine as possible while on vacation especially if they are young. If there are times of the day that they are more slower than others or they take naps – there is no shame in pulling back the blackout curtains and taking a nap in the middle of a hot Florida day in July at your hotel.
2.) The early risers – there is always that rooster child who wakes up earlier than the rest. Which can be not so fun after a hectic night out and everyone sleeping in one hotel room. Again decide which screen time hill you are willing to die on. If this child can watch morning cartoons with headphones or self entertain with legos set them up for success the night before.
3.) Long trips on planes. There is nothing as bad as a cranky, device overstimulated child. Once they start packing up the trash for the last meal on the flight, start alerting your little one you will be turning off the screen / overhead light. If the flight is during their regular sleep hours no need to break a sweat – let the body’s circadian rhythm do all the work. Simply turn off the light. Handing the little one a device because they are crying will do you more harm than good – their crying is merely communicating fatigue.
4.) Road trips – Start them early. We bought a car with a built-in DVD player and I begun noticing even short trips to school the kids would want to be watching a show. They would miss to engage with even the most mundane chipmunk crossing the street to something as huge as soaking in double rainbows. That was when I knew I had to shut that production down. So for long road trips – the sooner you start getting them used to sitting for extended periods without device stimulation the better. There is a great resource from my online colleague Kailan Carr specifically for activities for road trips – You can access it here along with her other great resources on quiet books. Kids podcasts with stories are also another great hack. There is just something about listening that stimulates the senses.
5.) Take a deep breath and have fun while on vacation. Your mental health will get you before any screen time guilt. Knowing that even on those days you feel we have failed to manage kids tech use and they have inhaled large amounts of digital candy; you are still winning in cushioning them with experiences and memories.