Gary Chapman wrote a phenomenal book for understanding kids love languages. Looking at our two kids it is clear as day they each have their own way that their tanks need refilling daily. Our daughter is a huge physical touch girl! She loves the cuddles, the hugs. Like literally in the morning she will come in the bed and be on your back. Our son on the other hand is a quality time kind of guy. “Play with me” is his love language. It is in these moments of connection that you see him come alive.
After school is always a time when emotions are high, ids love tans are at empty or near empty, there is lots pf projection from all the energy from other homes and it can easily become a time we slip into using our devices “to unwind.” I will be the first to raise my hand and say I have done this before – the kids were cranky lanky, my work day ended late, the meat was still frozen – my own tank was empty. I did not bat an eyelash and put on a show to get things back n sync. Like with all things screen time – things become problematic when it starts becoming a habit. The go-to. The thing we do to help us escape. Our slogan this year at work for mental health month was Don’t numb, it name it. My worry with constantly using devices to unwind is we end up numbing instead of running towards the direction of us and our kids emotions. Naming them, sitting and being comfortable with the uncomfortable day we had, and ultimately filling up their & potentially our love tanks.